boring

today....is another BORING DAY!!!!!!urgh....so bored to death cabn...nothing to do at home since exams are over!!!quite ironic isit.......when exams are here,u wanna use the com.and not study...when exams are over,u dun feel lyk using the com.and u get so darn BORED!!!!!welll......i have to go and play my game...hahahahhaha.....be cool

actually...

hmm.yes...ya took neoprints with cherie and clarrisa...it was totally retarded can...hahahhahaha...we did so many stupid "poses"...hahahaha....ok...fine..haven't blogged 4 long...well,as u can see,things are going fine for me and cherie....haha....ya...todae..while coming home rit....got CAUGHT in the RAIN!!!!hahahhahahaha.....so fun la...then it got a lil HEAVIER!!had to run all the way home can...haiz...nvm...so,now i'm on the com. going to play habbo soon..hahahahha....ya...tt's all i guess...haha

whatever!!!!

some day...some day

some day,i'll be the person you want me to be...but give me time..i have to change..i'm not a rag doll nor a non-living thing...i'm human and whatever happens,the memories of my past will be with me...i will remeber the people who treated me well and the ppl who didn't the teachers who were nice and motiviting and the teachers that were not....i have feelings....i want ppl out there to noe...if i could do smething about my attitude..i would...but i can't...i have tried and tried again...but almost every single day,i go home alone...reflecting on my day's work...and what i've done to make ppl detest me...even my own brother....why can't ppl just go along with the way their frens are made???why must ppl change???what happen to my childhood frens??what happen to hose happy days???why must things always change???why am i being detested??why am i always so forgiving and so IRRITATING??i dun want to be lyk this...i want to be normal...i want to be loved by everyone else out there...i want to be the coolest..i want to be the smartest...i want to be everytnhing except irritating...what happen to the outgouing person i was?why ???why???am i so irrtating in ppl's eyes?i have no faith now...i want to be able to put my trust in God's hand....but i can't...i'm a total failure...in everything...i really just hate the way i am.....i try to forgive and forget....but it becomes harder everyday...i have no one...no one to turn to...i look happy...but deep inside i'm hurt...by what the ppl say by what frens say....by the attitude the show me...why can't they just tell me not to tag along???why must they make me feel guilty..i hide it...from everyone...but one day....it has to come out and i've chosen this day...it's really time 4 me to reflect on my attitude...what cheirie said it's true....but,she needs to remove the log in her own eye before removing the splinter in other ppl's eye...meaning...she should look at her own faults b4 critising other ppl....i'm really sorry for what i did....who i humiliated....cos it's just humiliating 4 them...i should have think b4 i do stuff....i just realise something...i'm not brave..i have no courage.....i'm a coward and deep down inside i noe it...but,i noe what give me the strength not to jump down the building...it's the love God has shown to me..it's the blessings He showered upon me..it's the parent's he gave me....because He noe's that i can go on livng...but my trust in anybody...everybody...is going lower...i really need someone to tok to...i want someone....

to cherie black:
Victoria did not kick me out of her clique...i left on my own will
she is not mean...
i left because i noe i'm not wanted...
and i now my fults...
but i should use what God has given me..
not to change 4 the sake of other's
but to use everything He has given me to the maximum..
take out the log in your eye b4 u take out the splinter in mine...
i dun want to be blind...
i did reflections of my own...
and u should too..
not everyone is perfect...
and julis is not to...
i think it's rit 4 me to tell her where she stands...
if not,she might not noe...
i noe i'm insulting and irritating(long ago)
and so are u...i ahve already told julia sorri...so u don't have to harp on it
and u should try being in other ppl's shoe...
think about ur manners...
think about ur attitude...
i have almost taken the splinter out of my eye...
refect on urself...and think about what i wrote to u...
i would not want to build a wall against u..
i want us to be frens..
don't u???
think about the questiions...
think about ur life..
think about it....

sarah

NEVER FWENS:(

can we ever be frens again?
cos i noe we can't..
and i dun wanna try
cos' u are just someone
i met along the road of life
u were my special fwen
but mow i noe u are not
cos' i asked
and now i now